It’s every 12-year-old’s dream to see their favorite anime characters fighting each other. This game, which probably won’t make it to America, allows those fantasies to become virtual reality. I say it probably won’t be released in North America because it features two characters I’ve never heard or scene before. Nice to know it’s out there though, even though Goku would probably kill everyone and he technically won’t die. Stupid afterlife.
Tag Archive for Anime
All I see is a Space Elvis and a Space Otter having adventures near and on a Space Brothel. And I wouldn’t want it any other way. Directed by Shinichiro Watanabe of Cowboy Bebop fame, I sense similar themes with the added insanity only Space Elvis can provide. Oh, and a space brothel. You can’t forget about Space Brothel, for all your space whore needs.
The first two minutes of this latest Space Pirate Captain Harlock trailer are the standard absolutely beautiful but completely insane… whatever’s going on here. Just really pretty things happening for no apparent reason, giant space ships and mech warriors and explosions and sword fights. No clue what’s happening, but it’s awesome. Then, right at the two minute mark the trailer decides it hates you, and begins playing just the worst Japanese people singing English J-Pop love ballad nonsense in the world. Within a matter of seconds the world ceases making any sort of sense. What sort of just and loving creator would let this happen? And the world seemed so wonderful just seconds before!
When you’re looking at a movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters it’s hard not to associate it with anime, and even one anime in particular. So every giant robot poster seemed to be winking at you. Kind of saying “You and I both know what’s going on here.” But apparently we’re done with that. Cause we’re flat out saying it now. “It’s like an anime!” This poster shouts. “Get it?!” Yeah, we get it.
I never watched Battle of the Planets, so I honestly have no idea what’s going on here. Maybe it makes more sense to people who followed the show? Some kids have superpowers, so they dress up like birds, and then colorful anime-esque explosions happen. Then some other explosions happen, there’s a Phoenix, maybe they get some sort of airplane that’s still a far cry from the giant robots that your other notable “Five teens with Superpowers” teams got. “Voltron got a bunch of giant cats that transformed in to an even gianter robot! But you want me to punch people directly? Lame.”
Also, despite the entire thing being in Japanese, at one point English words do appear, instructing us to “Bump the Chicken.” I dunno.
Dragonball Z: Battle of Z has so many Zs. How many Zs? I dunno. Maybe… over Nine Thou-No! We’re not doing that!
So, yeah, another Dragonball Z game. All your Dragonball folks will fight with all your other Dragonball folks, there will be giant monkeys and a lot of people will probably end up being suddenly blonde. Just about what you’d expect. Course this is about the one millionth Dragonball Z game and you keep buying them, so I don’t even know why they need a trailer. The trailer could just be a screen that says “We put out another Dragonball Z game. It has all the same content as the last fifty, but you’re gonna buy it anyway.”
I don’t know how much sake you have to drink before you look at Kiki’s Delivery Service (either the original comic or the Miyazaki animated movie) and think “This needs to be live action! And let’s hire the guy who made Ju-On to direct it!” I’m gonna guess… a lot. Somewhere a sushi shop owner just retired early based on the number of sake bottles he sold to the gentlemen that came up with this idea. It’s bad. It’s a bad idea, and they shouldn’t have done it. Just look at this first official image. Certainly, if you saw her at an anime convention you’d think “Good job on the cosplay!” But that’s as good as you’d get. The premise is so ridiculous it barely works when everyone’s a cartoon. She looks dumb enough just standing there in that costume. Wait until they have her actually flying on the broom. Even in Harry Potter the broom flying is kind of unfortunate to watch, and literally everything in that movie is magic! This is going to be a million times worse. Why would you do this?
In the past, I’ve been critical of this CG version of anime, because, well, it’s weird, and it’s uncomfortable to watch, and manages to avoid the positive attributes of either Anime or CG, while exaggerating the flaws. It’s bad.
But… well, maybe it was just done terribly in the past. Because this Space Pirate Captain Harlock trailer is hot shit. Everything looks beautiful. Even furry-appeasing sexy cat lady aliens are visually appealing. It utilizes the freedom of the CG while maintaining that hard to define “anime” quality. It’s basically precisely the opposite of the Starship Troopers anime, or that terrifying Dragon Age thing. This is precisely what everyone else who tried wanted it to be. So, yeah, new rule: From now on you are allowed to make CG/Anime, but only if you do it Space Pirate Captain Harlock or better. This is the bar.
When did this happen? Why did we decide that actually having animators draw an anime was passe? I mean, we gave up on American classic animation years ago. But we were holding out for anime. But apparently anime lost out as well, cause it seems like every anime we’re getting recently is this weird CG trying to emulate anime look. If you want it to look like classic anime, there’s an easy solution. Just animate it like classic anime. Don’t animate it with this terrible style that creates monsters like this cat elf thing at twenty eight seconds. Eww.
As far as the content, well, I don’t know anything about Captain Harlock outside of that one Megas XLR episode, so this could be completely accurate, or wildly offensive. It does have giant ships, some if them with skulls on them, shooting at other giant ships, so I’m already sold. Just reminds me to close my eyes when that… thing shows up on screen.
Sam Jackson will be reteaming up with his Snakes on a Plane director David R. Ellis to star in Kite, the live action version of the anime about a abused girl who becomes a teenage assassin. And, in retrospect, Jackson’s probably not playing that part, Nicki Minaj wig notwithstanding. Instead he’ll probably be playing some generic bad guy, or a cop that’s trying to hunt her down. Which makes you wonder, why was he the first cast? “Before we cast our star, it’s vitally important that we cast the angry old man role!” Unlikely.