Will Call of Duty: Ghosts have Clans? Oh, it’s gonna have so much Clans! There will be cross platform Clans. Clans will fight other Clans. Being in a Clan will give you special Clans experience and bonuses. There’s so much Clans that they can’t even be contained by the game, as your Clans will spill over into your cell phone or tablet device. Clans! Has the word stopped having any sort of meaning yet? Because we can’t keep talking about Clans if it hasn’t. What else do Clans do? Oh, you’re going to be able to get in special Clans meta games, where your Clans compete with over Clans for control of map points by winning matches. And there’s also… actually, that might be all the Clans info. Still, that’s plenty of Clans information, isn’t it?
Other people are the worst, right? If only you could have a team that was just made up of other yous, you’d win every fight, right? Call of Duty: Ghosts knows where you’re coming from, and has introduced Squad mode, where you will play as a variety of characters, teaching them how to play just like you, allowing you to them field them in a variety of game modes that don’t require having to deal with any other humans on your team. Finally, you and your army of robotic clones will be able to show all those filthy noobs what a real team looks like. It’s glorious.
Call of Duty: Ghosts is harnessing it’s best Moonraker impression with the opening taking place in space for plot reasons. Then it is no longer in space and you have a dog for some reason. You know, this trailer really doesn’t make sense now that I randomly pick pieces of information out of it. Once you start in space its kind of hard to go back on that and make something cohesive and sensical. Right, every other Call of Duty game?
Do you enjoy playing Call of Duty multiplayer? Good news, the next Call of Duty will continue to let you do that! No longer will you have to wonder “Will the next Call of Duty game offer pretty much the same experience as all the previous Call of Duties except with this latest game’s gimmick?” It will, indeed. You will be able to continue shooting each other like you have in the past, but now you can also blow up the enviroment a bit too. And since this is available on the next gen systems, it will look even prettier that previous times you shot each other in pretty much the same ways.
Also, that dog will be around. And Eminem, I guess? Also, holy shit, it was a lady this whole time! This trailer just Metroided your ass. You thought ie was a dude shooting those folks, but you didn’t even know. Take that, sexism!
The same mask! The exact same mask as Darth Nihilus! What’re you guys doing over there? At least change it a little.
Anyway, more Call of Duty. This time they’re Ghosts, which means they fly to a variety of landscapes and shoot folks. Complete departure for the series. But this time they have a dog! And… uh… masks? Also, there’s a tidal wave, it looks like. That’s a new thing, I think.
As for the graphics, they’re terrible? I mean, I think they look fine, but YouTube commenters have told me otherwise, and I don’t want to lead you wrong. So, they’re pretty awful. You should just watch this whole thing in disgust. It might as well be Contra. It might as well be that Dot in Adventure. Just horrendous.
Obviously you’re not counting down the days or anything, but maybe one lazy Sunday afternoon you realize “Hey, that one movie was released,” and you’ll go to see a matinee or something. Or maybe you’ll just wait for it to show up on Netflix? You’ll definitely watch it at some point… probably. Somehow. Unless you don’t. Also a possibility. It’s not like you have a problem with it, exactly. But you’re not sure if you’re interested in it either. It just is.
For some reason, I like seeing the skeptic being attacked by the very thing they are most skeptical of. The cool thing about The Awakening, is that it looks like a mystery and it very well could be that the whole thing is an elaborate, elaborate hoax. No one would see that one coming. Except me, because I just said it. Dibs.